Depression Explained

1. You are depressed.
2. You are depressed because of thoughts going through your mind.
3. The thoughts going through your mind paint a gloomy picture of yourself and the world.
4. But these thoughts are unrealistic and unhelpful.
5. By seeing things in a more realistic and helpful way, you will feel less depressed.

Example: Tommy was lying on his bed staring out of his window. He was depressed. In his mind he was thinking about all the "bad" things in life - failed relationships, nasty people, being unemployed, feeling out of place - as well as all the "bad" things about himself - his physical shape, his inability to find a girlfriend or a job. Life in Tommy's mind was overwhelmingly unpleasant.

However, in reality Tommy was lying on a comfortable double bed in a comfortable flat with all mod-cons. Outside his window the sun shone warmly, lighting up a beautiful blue sky and bouncing vibrant lush colour off the swaying trees below. People passed below in the street, many of them perfectly pleasant and making the best of life according to what they knew. Further, in reality Tommy was a young able-bodied man, intelligent, talented in many ways, attractive, much loved, with a small but quality social and family circle.

Life was not really so gloomy. In fact, if Tommy concentrated exclusively on the positive pleasant aspects of life and himself and interpreted the supposedly "bad" aspects in a more balanced rational light, his outlook would turn 180 degrees from gloomy to positively cheery. It would be as if suddenly the light of the sun flooded in saturating everything while the gloom that covered everything up was suddenly lifted.

Depression: a Guide

A Step by Step Guide to Feeling Depressed

It occured to me while I was washing a week's worth of piled up dishes today that it would be useful to list all the thoughts and beliefs that contribute to making me feel so unmotivated and depressed. I had a quick flick through How to Win Friends and Influence People last night and Mr Carnegie makes a very good point in a preliminary chapter on how the human mind is so utterly useless at retaining information and how we must revise things on a regular basis in order that we don't forget them entirely.

The list:

1. Be harsh, critical and punishing with yourself especially about past events
2. Play back painful past events over and over in your mind reliving the emotions
   
3. Take a completely unsympathetic view of yourself, your actions and life
   
4. Call yourself names, caricaturing yourself by focusing on some negative quality or action
   
5. Take a simplistic unsympathetic view of all things devoid of nuance
   
6. Sit at home neglecting yourself, avoiding enjoyable activities and human contact
7. Do nothing productive whatsoever, instead sit in your own mess wallowing endlessly
8. Make your happiness dependent upon the approval and esteem of others
   

Alternatively:

1. Be gentle and understanding with yourself, you're a human
   
2. Beating yourself up about past events = depression, nothing more. Stop it.
3. Take a sympathetic understanding view of yourself, you're human
   
4. Remember that humans are a complex mix of positive negative and neutral
5. Remember that things are never as simple as they seem - many factors are at play
6. Do things that you enjoy and work on building a heathly social circle
7. Be productive, have realistic goals, keep yourself occupied
   
8. Approval addiction = dangerously vulnerable junky-like state. End it now.